Feeling Human

Slowly can feel myself becoming me again. I'd be lying if I said it was easy. It's a 24 hour a day effort that involves a truckload of self-talk, just as much exercise, and a lot of distancing myself from my phone.

Finding out I'm normal with just a few hang-ups as a result of my relationships with my parents was a relief. It was nice to make the decision to stop the medication and then see myself settle. I guess it felt like taking life back into my own hands...

It's interesting that people say they can see the difference...

Apparently the identifying feature of a Borderline Personality Disorder is a fear of abandonment. That man who was in my life basically did absolutely everything he could to play those strings... Perhaps the calm comes with knowing that through all this, the ups and downs, the fights, the distance, we're both still here. We're not 'together', but he won't leave my life unless I tell him too. Maybe it needed to be so rough and rocky so that I would see that... And start to shift that thinking...?

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Location:Sheridan St,Cairns,Australia